Relationships are challenging when we stand in our own truth.
Many of us shed our conditioned need for approval and acceptance by others over a period of a life time. A few are born centered within and nothing pulls them out of their natural flow of Being.
Some of us, like myself, grew up "feeling" that they don't quite fit in any of the molds presented by society and instinctively believe that this process is actually counter intuitive to the experience of Self. Of course, at the age of six, these were not the words I would have used to describe my state of mind.
As I matured, my desire to explore and do my own thing was often described as selfish and self centered by those who could not understand my inability to remain confined when I felt physically and spiritually out of balance. Yet, all the relationships I participated in were teaching examples for my own growth. Without an "other", there is no mirror by which to view our thoughts and feelings.
There are no coincidences. Each friend, family member, co-worker, boss, neighbor and life partner crossed my path when I was ready to learn the next lesson. I am still learning to let go of judgments and expectations. When you drop the need to defend yourself and explain your actions to anyone, the suffering created by opposing perceptions drops away. It does take two to tango, so to speak.
It took me decades to come to this point in my journey. I know that you are learning the same lessons at an accelerated rate and that the contrasts have been, at times, very difficult for you, since harmony is your natural state and disharmony has been your experience with others, including myself.
In most relationships, we consciously and unconsciously negotiate our wants and desires with others. As an only child surrounded by adults growing up, much was demanded of you to fill, by your sheer presence, the lack of self-love most of us were experiencing but not taking personal responsibility for.
I trust that all is as it should be for you as it is for me and all those we meet.
Be kind to yourself and continue to demonstrate patience and compassion for all of us who are still figuring out the curriculum for this mystery school called the human experience.